This manuscript uses Goldsmith's (2004) normative model of social support to explore conversations women have with a romantic partner about vulvodynia, a chronic genital pain condition. Twenty-five women with vulvodynia participated in semi-structured interviews in which they described conversational goals, discussed challenges, and offered advice to others managing vulvodynia. Four dilemmas emerged from the data analysis: (a) I need to talk about it but I don't want to, (b) I want to have sex without causing myself pain, (c) I want to be sexual without feeling inadequate, and (d) I want to be honest about my condition without jeopardizing the relationship. Three major strategies for mitigating the effects of these dilemmas were also uncovered. These dilemmas represent ambiguity about the causes and duration of pain and the implications that being unable to have pain-free sex has for their relationships and identities as women. Theoretical contributions are described. Then, contextual and practical implications are overviewed for women, their partners, and medical providers.
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